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taximan
PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 1:03 am 
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Location: Royal Forest of Dean
Old Lady who is a known customer just called and said " i am doing a box up for the troops abroad can you go get me a porn mag to put in the box" . Hmmm i said yes but the misses says you aint going into a local shop and getting one of those. Now her neighbours tell me she is a raving drunken lunatic. What would you lot do.
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grandad
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 1:41 am 
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Give her one of your old ones! :wink:

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dagger
PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 10:17 am 
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Joined: Tue Sep 22, 2009 11:39 am
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taximan wrote:
Old Lady who is a known customer just called and said " i am doing a box up for the troops abroad can you go get me a porn mag to put in the box" . Hmmm i said yes but the misses says you aint going into a local shop and getting one of those. Now her neighbours tell me she is a raving drunken lunatic. What would you lot do.
I get easily embarrissed like you!! I won't go in the shop for anything like birthday cards, toilet rolls fairy liquid or porno mags so I just tell the missus to get them herself.
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Chris the Fish
PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 11:22 am 
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taximan wrote:
i said yes but the misses says you aint going into a local shop and getting one of those. Now her neighbours tell me she is a raving drunken lunatic. What would you lot do.


You could try to stop the wife drinking.

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Stationtone
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 12:14 pm 
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grandad wrote:
Give her one of your old ones! :wink:



Yes give her one of your old ones preferably one that is not stuck together :oops:
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bloodnock
PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 1:50 pm 
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taximan wrote:
Old Lady who is a known customer just called and said " i am doing a box up for the troops abroad can you go get me a porn mag to put in the box" . Hmmm i said yes but the misses says you aint going into a local shop and getting one of those. Now her neighbours tell me she is a raving drunken lunatic. What would you lot do.



Just ply the old dear with drink and ask her to strip naked and pose for some photo's herself....you can use your own photographic skills to take some artistically framed shots of her in all her Au Naturalle Autumn of life beauty...the boys on the Afghani front line can either enjoy the photos on there own artistic merits or have them enlarged and show them to the Taliban which may make them die of fright thus saving bullets..

Image







And to offset the other Photo and to give an eqilibrium within the thread and a photo that office wallahs of the various bodies can open without fear of being sacked ..I..offer you..This!!

Simply scroll up the page fast at the sound of approaching footsteps..

Image
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taximan
PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 3:05 pm 
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Location: Royal Forest of Dean
Image[/quote]

Urg Vile, are you sure you are a FIT AND PROPER PERSON>
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grandad
PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 3:20 pm 
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taximan wrote:
Image


Urg Vile, are you sure you are a FIT AND PROPER PERSON>[/quote]

She probably wouldn't think much of you either.

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Grandad,
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bloodnock
PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 3:45 pm 
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taximan wrote:
Image

Quote:
Urg Vile, are you sure you are a FIT AND PROPER PERSON>


Just trying to help you out...you'd best scuttle off to the top shelf of WH Smiths... :twisted:
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taximan
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 4:46 pm 
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Location: Royal Forest of Dean
Actually that picture looks like her, have you already delivered the porn.
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bloodnock
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 4:48 pm 
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taximan wrote:
Actually that picture looks like her, have you already delivered the porn.


Hell no.....Im in it!!!
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grumpy
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 4:50 pm 
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bloodnock wrote:
taximan wrote:
Actually that picture looks like her, have you already delivered the porn.


Hell no.....Im in it!!!


you mean, in it as in, nah I can't go there, it's a family forum :roll:

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My heart is heavy, but my consience clear,
I voted Yes, without any fear.
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skippy41
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 4:55 pm 
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taximan wrote:
Actually that picture looks like her, have you already delivered the porn.


Gues who wont be getting IT for a very long time if SWMBO reads that comment :lol: :lol: :lol:

Go to your local filling station or the place where all mags and newspapers are distributed from and ask them to keep the out of date ones that are sent back ether you collect them or ask them to send them directly to our troops
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taximan
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 4:57 pm 
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Location: Royal Forest of Dean
Ahh yes i can see the Private Hire Badge hangin round her neck, well hanging from somewhere anyway.....
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skippy41
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PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2009 5:08 pm 
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Email sent to the sun asking them to help :wink:
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