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 Post subject: Re: New Jokes thread
PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2020 9:34 pm 
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Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 4:06 pm
Posts: 22307
Location: A City near Birmingham
Sadly news has just reached us saying that the first member of this group has sadly died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 500 cans of assorted food, 100kg of pasta, 75kg of rice, 200 toilet rolls and 30L of hand sanitiser which he had panic bought from Aldi “just in case!”

The whole lot collapsed and buried the daft [edited by admin]!

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 Post subject: Re: New Jokes thread
PostPosted: Fri Mar 13, 2020 10:49 am 
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Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2006 11:47 pm
Posts: 13874
Location: Stamford Britains prettiest town till SKDC ruined it
Ad in local paper today

FOR SALE:

100 bite sized sausage rolls
250 haggis bites
150 ready to eat cocktail sausages.
300 scotch Eggs
12 family bags of Doritos
5 jars salsa dip.

Genuine reason for selling......... misread headlines and went Picnic Buying.....

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 Post subject: Re: New Jokes thread
PostPosted: Thu Mar 26, 2020 7:15 am 
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Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2006 11:47 pm
Posts: 13874
Location: Stamford Britains prettiest town till SKDC ruined it
On a serious note I heard a Dr. on TV this morning saying in this time of Coronavirus staying at home is difficult but we should focus on inner peace. To achieve this we should always finish things we start and we all could use more calm in our lives. I looked through my house to find things I'd started and hadn't finished, so I finished off a bottle of Pinot, a bottle of Gin, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, tha mainder of me valiumun srciptuns, an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how blumin fablus I feel rite now. Sned this to all who need inner ****. An telum u luvum. And two hash yer wands, stafe day avrybobby!!!

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