Taxi Driver Online

London Taxi Fires Explained

19th September 2008

Top UK scientist Professor Hugh Jarse was today able to reveal the mysterious cause of recent black cab fires in London.

"After extensive research and interviews with drivers I can now reveal the cause of the hitherto unexplained events." said Professor Jarse.

"Taxis with the TX4 branding were fitted with an unusual catalytic converter that could also process bigoted views as spouted by your average London cabbie and convert them into the views of a reasonable person. The cabs that exploded were exposed to over ten times the usual dosage of bullsh*t causing a catastrophic malfunction in the converter that manifested itself in a fiery inferno." continued the professor.

Taxi drivers across London were busy being retrained to be a little more tolerant of other people and cultures, although, it is believed to be an almost impossible task.

"Gor blimey guv'nor" said one driver "I was midway through a rant about east europeans when I could see smoke coming from under me hood. I shut up and started to say things like 'I enjoy aspects of their culture and they were adding to the exciting diversity that is London' and the smoke quickly disappeared."


Source; The Spoof

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Brummie Cabbie.

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It's supposed to be read Professor Hugh Jarse, or Huge Arse.

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Kind regards,

Brummie Cabbie.

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I was reading in the daily sport the other day

I quote

According to Mr Dick Head chairman of the pressure group congestion for London these fires are the result of the use of secret weapons fitted to our members 4 x 4 vehicles when a TX 4 cab tries to stop them cutting him up they fire a mini flamethrower to set the said taxi on fire thus stopping him in his tracks and leaving the road space available for our members cars

unquote

well I heard that the exploding vehicles had been supplied to UK cabbies by mistake and had been earmarked for export to the taliban and bagdad taxi companies. (so the good ones are out there.....)

cor blime g'vnor, which way is mecca?.....

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Of all the things ive lost, i miss my mind the most

Do they have words in the sport?

_________________
Grandad,

East!

_________________
Grandad,

how far east?...

_________________
Of all the things ive lost, i miss my mind the most

There is one in Lowestoft. That is about as far east as you can go in England.

_________________
Grandad,

Not if you're coming from Pakistan it ain't.

If you're in Pakistan, then Mecca is west or more precisely, West-south-west, or something like that, but it ain't east to Mecca!

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Kind regards,

Brummie Cabbie.

Type a message, post your news,
Disagree with other members' views;
But please, do have some decorum,
When debating on the TDO Forum.

seems the first 100 muslim immigrants into the UK are claiming compensation, for 40 years (after asking a cabbie which was mecca was) they have been praying towards a bingo hall....

_________________
Of all the things ive lost, i miss my mind the most

englandistan
britistan
londondesh
bradfordhambra

walsall is now warsaw
crewe is crewanistza

_________________
Of all the things ive lost, i miss my mind the most