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PostPosted: Tue Apr 27, 2010 6:56 pm 
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Location: grangemouth
http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=SfPgSzcu9RY

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My heart is heavy, but my consience clear,
I voted Yes, without any fear.


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PostPosted: Sun May 02, 2010 11:13 am 
My ex-wife started taking flying lessons about the time our divorce started and she got her license shortly before our divorce was final, later that same year.

Yesterday afternoon I got a phone call that she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting. Seems she was forced to make an emergency landing in Bringelly because of bad weather. Thank God the kids weren't with her.

The FAA issued a preliminary report, citing pilot error: She was flying a single engine aircraft in IFR (instrument flight rating) conditions while only having obtained a VFR (visual flight rating) rating.

The absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured.

The photograph below was taken at the scene to show the extent of damage to her aircraft.

She was really lucky.
































































































































































































Image


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PostPosted: Mon May 03, 2010 9:35 am 
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Location: SCOTLAND
:lol: :lol: :lol: I am so sore this morning and that has made it worse :lol:


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PostPosted: Mon May 03, 2010 3:48 pm 
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My wife's one is a lot older than that.... but still works perfectly well..... it's obvious from the picture, that it has been modified...... the old ones are always the best..... :lol: :lol:

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Justice for the 96. It has only taken 27 years...........repeat the same lies for 27 years and the truth sounds strange to people!


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PostPosted: Mon May 03, 2010 4:19 pm 
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Location: SCOTLAND
Even the military are starting to use these
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PostPosted: Thu May 06, 2010 2:15 am 
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Location: Scotland
A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a Virgin".

"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

"Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me.

"Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

"Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had theorder, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

"Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.

"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

"Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it...

"Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.

"Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.

"Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was lick it..... God I miss him.

" But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".



"Wonderful", said the husband, "but why?

"You're with the
"GOVERNMENT"

This time I KNOW I'M gonna get screwed."


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PostPosted: Thu May 06, 2010 2:18 am 
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Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2005 8:44 pm
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Location: Scotland
Male Date-Drug
(be sure to watch the video at the end)

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink by any woman.

Many females use a date-drug on the market called 'Beer ' .

The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large kegs.

Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them.

A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no-strings-attached sex.

Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several Beers , men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women to whom they would never normally be attracted.

After drinking Beer , men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that 'something bad' occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as 'a relationship' . In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer-term form of servitude and punishment referred to as 'marriage'.
Men are much more susceptible to this scam after Beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females..

Please forward this warning to every male you know.

If you fall victim to this 'Beer ' scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men.

For the support group nearest you, just look up 'Golf Courses' in the phone book.

For a video to see how Beer works click here:


Beer Demo
http://www.brackenspub.com/beer.swf


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PostPosted: Fri May 07, 2010 8:57 am 
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Location: grangemouth
Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop in Dingle, they walk over to the bird section and Gerry says to Paddy, 'Dat's dem.'



The owner comes over and asks if he can help them.



'Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere little budgies in dat cage up dere,' says Gerry.



The owner puts the budgies in a cardboard box.



Paddy and Gerry pay for the birds, leave the shop and get into Gerry's truck to drive to the top of the Connor Pass.



At the Connor Pass , Gerry looks down at the 1000 foot drop and says, 'Dis looks like a grand place.'



He takes two birds out of the box, puts one on each shoulder and jumps off the cliff.



Paddy watches as the budgies fly off and Gerry falls all the way to the
bottom, killing himself stone dead.



Looking down at the remains of his best pal, Paddy shakes his head and
says, 'Fook dat. Dis budgie jumping is too fook'n dangerous for me!'





THERE'S MORE...





Moment's later; Seamus arrives up at ConnorPass.



He's been to the pet shop too and walks up to the edge of the cliff
carrying another cardboard box in one hand and a shotgun in the other..



'Hi, Paddy, watch dis,' Seamus says.



He takes a parrot from the box and lets him fly free.



He then throws himself over the edge of the cliff with the gun..



Paddy watches as half way down, Seamus takes the gun and shoots the
parrot.



Seamus continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and
breaks every bone in his body.



Paddy shakes his head and says, 'And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting either!'





IT IS NOT OVER YET...





Paddy is just getting over the shock of losing two friends when Sean appears.



He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a cardboard box out of
which he pulls a chicken



Sean then takes the chicken by its legs and hurls himself off the cliff
and disappears down and down until he hits a rock and breaks his spine.




Once more Paddy shakes his head.



'Fook dat, lads. First dere was Gerry with his budgie jumping, den
Seamus parrotshooting... And now Sean and his fook'n hengliding!'

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My heart is heavy, but my consience clear,
I voted Yes, without any fear.


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PostPosted: Fri May 07, 2010 6:45 pm 
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Location: grangemouth
MARS BAR RENAMED
MARS bars are being renamed " Believe " to rally England fans for the World Cup.
Bosses hope it will inspire England to emulate Bobby Moore's 1966 World Cup win with England .
The chocolate bar will change later this month for the first time since it was made in 1920 and will revert to Mars after the tournament ends in July.
Andrea Taylor, of Mars, said: "As the nation's favourite chocolate bar, Mars is in an ideal position to fuel positivity for the World Cup."
The Believe range will also be sold in Scotland , Wales and Ireland , though with a more general philosophical message - as they failed to make the finals.
England Football Supporters Federation boss Malcolm Clarke said:
"A Mars bar is still a Mars bar, whatever it's called. I guess some will see it as jumping on the bandwagon."
Rivals Nestle will also put images of England 's 1966 victory on Kit Kats and Yorkies.
Experts expect similar stunts from hundreds of other companies. Marketing magazine Brand Republic said:
"It's the biggest sports marketing opportunity of the decade - companies don't want to be left behind."

This is the Tartan Army's response:

Image

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My heart is heavy, but my consience clear,
I voted Yes, without any fear.


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PostPosted: Sat May 08, 2010 8:00 am 
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Isn't Mars an American company?

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Grandad,


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PostPosted: Sat May 08, 2010 12:40 pm 
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Location: grangemouth
After his examination, the doctor said to the elderly man, "You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about?"
"In fact, I do," said the old man. "After I have sex with my wife I am usually hot and sweaty, and then, after I have it with her the second time, I am usually cold and chilly."

After examining his elderly wife, the doctor said, "Everything appears to be fine. Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me?"
The lady replied that she had no questions or concerns.
The doctor then said to her: "Your husband had an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually hot and sweaty after having sex with you the first time, and then cold and chilly after the second time. Do you know why?"
"Oh that crazy old fart, she replied. "That's because the first time is usually in August and the second time is in January.

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My heart is heavy, but my consience clear,
I voted Yes, without any fear.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun May 09, 2010 8:18 pm 
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Joined: Mon Dec 08, 2008 12:04 pm
Posts: 2859
Location: SCOTLAND
Unusual Puzzle
Not your usual jigsaw puzzle!

This is amazing, the picture has movement in it the entire time you are working on it.

Drag the pieces together to make a picture. Most difficult, but yes, it can be done completely in a couple of minutes! and it will give a round of applause you when it is comple
http://www.brl.ntt.co.jp/people/hara/fly.swf


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PostPosted: Tue May 11, 2010 6:51 pm 
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Location: grangemouth
After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, Irish scientists
found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the
conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more
than 100 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the Irish, in the weeks that followed, an English
archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a story
published in the Sassenach Morning Herald read:

"English archaeologists, finding traces of 130-year-old copper wire,
have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech
communications network 30 years earlier than the Irish".

One week later, the Banffshire Courier in Buckie, Scotland, reported
the following:

"After digging as deep as 30 feet in his pasture near Enzie,
Banffshire, Jock Smith, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he
found absolutely f### all. Jock has therefore concluded that 130 years
ago, Scotland had already gone wireless."

Just makes you proud to be a Scot!

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My heart is heavy, but my consience clear,
I voted Yes, without any fear.


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PostPosted: Sun May 16, 2010 2:41 pm 
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Location: SCOTLAND
I am not sure if i have posted this before but it is so good.Super cop has got to be the best ever . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3t9cHFz9lI


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PostPosted: Tue May 18, 2010 10:07 am 
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Location: SCOTLAND
Weird
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1BXxYGu ... re=related :?


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