Taxi Driver Online

Well, yeah, in a nutshell (that AE? Well, you´ve got to be tolerant on a few Americanisms with me) that´s what it is, I`m at the council´s gorge, saying gimme da badge or I´ll might start a rebellion! Yet, then again the council´s position is: we have to be firm, for only one small exception might start a rebellion.

So, seriously I, or whoever is better suited, can only start a rebellion, if there is something in the system, where can you have some leverage, something which is not only wrong but just stinks.

So, either they can allow themselves to be generous and understanding or they are already sitting on a powder-keg, all edgy and nervous.

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

A lot of councils make exceptions on other things,ie vehicle age ect.so they can't have it all ways,if they can make exceptions on these things then they after do the same with everything else?

I take it you meant that the council do can make an exception in this situation, mancityfan and I like to thank for that.

Now, when we look at rules in general, they can be as good and as dire needed as they can be (f.ex. there be should be a general rule for removing s_hitheads like Assad from power!) and as fitting as they are for a vast majority of cases, there is not one single rule on Earth that applies for actually everybody and without any exception.

This is even laid out in the saying no good rule without an exception.

And as long as there are rules there will be exceptions or at least people asking for them and in democracies at least these people can be sure they will not be imprisoned or shot just for that.

So, whoever says we cannot make an exception from that rule is a dictator and is just not willing to take real care of the people who are in his care.

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

Wouldn't it be a rigid policy if no exceptions are possible?

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http://wingsoverscotland.com/ http://www.newsnetscotland.com/

Jochen, forgive me if I have this wrong but you write as if we owe you something, I find this very disappointing tbh as I've always looked at the German people as progressive and not a nation of people who gripe when told no.

You simply can't come here and dictate things, it all goes back to if you don't like it go away, and tbh if people don't like something that is the accepted way in that country, why should they want to live in that country anyway.

Now I've tried to save you a lot of hassle here, in 2009 you may well have been earning here ok, it's now 2012 and the place is dead as, if you want to waste money getting back here only to find you should've listened to me then so be it, but if you have one grain of sense you'll read these boards and take my advice and steer well clear right now, there are enough of the other guy's saying the same as me regarding lack of work, we are now down a generation of kids who haven't been able to find work because the starter jobs are all taken by migrant's, it was in a national newspaper a few weeks ago, I've known it for a long time, these kids are now off the ladder, so that is a customer base destroyed, they won't have money to spend like those before them did and this means (as those employ the cheap worker firms) will find soon no customers to sell to, these are your global capatalist you so hate, not a licensing dept, anyway you don't read like a guy who listens so I guess we will be seeing you some time soon.

Well, Doom, I hate to say, but unlike you I always listen very carefully, I read a lot and I always had an open eye - but I don´t follow orders just because I am expected to. If I don´t see any sense in it I will not obey.

I am well aware of the desolate situation in England now, thanks anyway for pointing it out to me again, that´s one more good reason why I wouldn´t apply as a first time applicant again and above all one more perfect reason not to even expect it from me on the part of the council. I mean am I stupid or what? Hello, council? Do all this again just to earn [edited by admin], live in a dump and get abuse for free? Hello?

No, I am not stupid, though perhaps you may think I have something of a naive dreamer who might one day realise that all he has fought for was fool´s gold, yet, this world owns a lot to idealists and still only bows to the rich.

Yet, if you expect me to accept the way things are here, when they are simply stupid or just stay at home I will disappoint you, I do none of it, I do it my own way and that means fighting it.

Now, I was only waiting for someone to mention it, of course I know that no one will ever lift a finger for me in this situation as long as it is just my own personal problem, not because I am a foreigner, but because I want to be someone special and there is not a thing on Earth a cab-driver hates more, except licensing fees perhaps, than a colleague who wants be something special, this was not in any way different in Germany from the moment on I had written my first book and every other one was begrudging me it.

So, of course, I don´t expect anyone joining me in my fight, but what keeps me from joining you in your fight, against annual renewal plus fee, against stubborn bureaucrats who only govern people instead of taking care of them?

And let me make this clear, we should all strive for higher goals, this is my opinion, but whatever becomes of me, may I have success in what I am doing or not and will be able to live only on my writing or not, I´ll be always one of you, I will never forget how it was when I began in this job as a simple driver, just like any of you.

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

Kälte-Chaos an der Uni Stuttgart: Hunderte Studenten warteten bei minus 15 Grad auf den Beginn ihrer Prüfung - doch der Hörsaal blieb zu. Als auch nach einer Stunde der passende Schlüssel nicht auftauchte, entschied die Uni: Ihr habt alle bestanden. Polizisten gratulierten per Megafon

It was in the news yesterday, German students were waiting outside in the cold, minus 15 celsius, for the exam-room to be opened and when after an hour of waiting still no one obviously could find the key, the Uni decided that all students have passed the exam, the police were congratulating via megaphone!

Now, this is the spirit, I say to all stubborn bureaucrats! This is how you will win people´s hearts and turn them from grim fighters into good citizens, that love their country and will one day happily return this gratitude!

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

Explains everything about you Jochen.


So because it was cold and a key couldn't be found it was decided to award a pass to all those that got cold, brilliant!, so you now have potential stupid people who have a document that says they aren't stupid.

Woking things that way I should tell Arsene Wenger to claim the league title for Aresnal this year, and if anyone says otherwise, he should just say if they hadn't had the injuries to key players and had spent £300 million in January the title would've been there's anyway because they turned up for every game and the results shouldn't matter.

Everyday I see "modern people" playing havoc with things to change them to their own personal agenda, well see it this way, you are a **** hater aren't you, the very thing that is going on right now is breeding the **** model rapidly because some have worked their way up and other expect to come in at the top.

I'll give you another example i8n todays news, Capello quiting, I back him all the way, the English FA are just another example of how f****d up things are, they've undermined a manager, basically found John Terry guilty in advance, and now the team faces a new manager just months before a tournament and without the better defender now cos he's bound to get dropped as well, and looking at the footage I saw on TV Anton Ferdinand had plenty to say to JT before JT replied, plus Rio was on TV at the weekend basically saying he had to back his little brother, but his face said differently, and having been JT's partner in defence for England I suspect it's a situation he can do without.

I´m beginning to like you, Doom, let´s have a beer, when I come over, or two!

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

We have that too. Think it's called an NVQ

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http://wingsoverscotland.com/ http://www.newsnetscotland.com/

@ Jochen, you'll need more than one or two, I'm a raving drunk according to some here

Okay, so you have me on your back again, it seems, the room is handed in, the flight is booked...
I´m bringing a little bit of money, a tent, some fat I can live on and I am hoping for the best and prepared for the worst!
I sent this letter to the superior of Brighton HCO yesterday, we´ll see how this will work put, I keep you posted about it!
Alright, mates, hopefully I´ll be, one way or another, an English cabby again, soon, I am looking very much forward to it!


"14.3.12 Dear Madam

I am writing you now to tell you that I will arrive in England by the end of this month.

I have booked a flight on the 28th and by that time I will have cleared out my room here and so come as an immigrant, for another time.

This also means that you have me on your back, sort of, what ever will happen to me, whether I will have success with what I am doing or land in the gutter, because of HCO´s strictness, it will be an English problem, I am not going back to Germany until this is sorted.

I would very much appreciate if you´d allow me, Madam, to finally talk about all this in person and would therefor give me an appointment, from the 29th of March on.
I will then also be ready to give you a demonstration of my knowledge so far, so perhaps, hopefully, although you couldn´t do it the first time I´ve asked you about, you would be able to give me a provisional license now, as you might look upon this as proof that I can and actually will do what I have said I will - so that I can support myself until I am ready to show you the full knowledge, as I intend to have learned in about one or two months, from now on, because otherwise I am not so sure how I ever could.

To my situation now: for I am 50, already (and burnt out from years of writing, being bullied by neighbours who have a great time when I am sitting there trying to finish my newest not-going-to-be-published-novel, and not knowing where to get any money to make it through the next month) it is not likely I´d be able to find work, for there is only little anyway now, so obviously I will apply for any benefits I could get and if I would indeed get them it would help a lot, but I am not so optimistic, for I haven´t lived here long and not since Feb. 2009.

I still have (for I had only spent what I needed for rent and food in the last ten years as an unknown writer, who has driven a cab in three countries and lived like a dog) some money saved, which I kept, instead of giving it back to my debtors, I am bringing my tent and will be able to pay for the flight, the fees and to keep me alive for three months living in my tent illegally somewhere in the bushes or maybe, if some kind soul will have mercy with me and allow me to put it up in the garden for free or just some little money. (I surely can cut down my food rations a bit because I am slightly overweight anyway or maybe I can come begging for food at the office from time to time.) By no means this money would be enough to pay the ridiculously high rents in the Brighton area, let alone a hotel or camping-ground!

See, the thing is, I might actually get another loan from somewhere, bank or my future employer, yet how am I supposed to pay it back? Last time, in 2008/9, I was working full time, but wasn´t even able to put enough money away, so that I could pay taxes, when they were due, just because of the high rents and costs of living and because the job doesn´t pay anymore. Moreover, from what I have heard it is even worse now and is not likely to get any better, because England is run now by a bunch of millionaires, who just don´t have any clue about real life of ordinary people whatsoever.

When I have arrived I will of course apply for the English driver´s license and also as a first time applicant just in case. (For, in the end, it would also be a possibility to just spare me some parts of the requirements, such as the two tests that require a car.
I might actually be able to buy a very cheap car, but it´s rather unlikely, last time I bought one for 500 Pounds and it broke down practically the very moment I signed the contract, bought as seen and test-driven, with head gasket, about which the guy in the garage told me I was clearly ripped off, because there were old stains of cooling liquid all over, so they basically looked for some dumb foreigner stupid enough to buy it just before it breaks down on them.

About the DSA-test, I wouldn´t complain that much about it, if they would be fair, which they are not, because last time they failed me, me, who had been ten times around the globe, for two times and also it wouldn´t be so bad, if it´d be about showing driving skills you really need in a cab, such as the ability to drive whilst talking to passenger or into the mike or still be able to focus on the road whilst arguing or simply communicating with passengers, instead of driving like being back in driving school. This is not in any way helping, especially while all the while people are speeding and driving really aggressively all over the UK! I was shocked about this, how children are endangered here and I´d strongly recommend a speed control system like in Switzerland, where people drive real slow! (Except the people from Italy or the Balkan living in Switzerland, obviously.))

About the knowledge: by the time I will arrive I will be able to pass the two knowledge tests, by at least 80%, it is not more now mainly because of my alcoholic half Russian neighbour bullying me (there was police in the house already, but he and his drinking mates told them a bunch of lies about me and so they said they can´t do a thing). Yet, last time when I passed the tests I had the beginning and end of the roads in my head, but by now already I will be able to draw a sketch from it and the adjoining roads, which is of much more practical use than the former, because it helps you much more to actually find your way in the respective area, than just the knowledge of where that road begins and ends.

Yet, by then, the time of my arrival, I will also have already written every tiny little spot from the AZ street-atlas list on cards, which makes it altogether about 3000 roads, streets, crescents, places, paths, mews, and tiny little alleyways no one hardly even knows they exist, that I am offering to you to actually learn within the next months, to present you that unheard-of, super knowledge, that will stand for all time and will make me a herald for Brighton & Hove´s knowledge standards all over the world!!!!

I am not saying, that all of this is actually of practical use and should be used as standard requirement, oh no, I think there are many more skills a cab-driver should be, and most of the time actually is, an expert in, especially dealing with all kinds of situations and passengers, but it is something I like to give to you in return, so that you would be in the position to make an exception for me, without having just any other guy coming next demanding the same.

There might be a point on me being cross and feeling discriminated, because I just simply couldn´t meet the requirements for an annual renewal, being a cab-driver in Switzerland at that time, but I am ready to meet this in a positive way and turn the situation into something outstanding and unique, this will be the best knowledge HCO ever had, even more I will hand this in at Guinness, as a world-record attempt “best cab-knowledge world-wide” (per square mile and in a major city) and will too at “Wetten Dass”, (which will run now with a new guy) and it doesn´t matter one speck if they ignore me or not, I will be the Herald of Brighton´s Knowledge Standards!

This is, if you let me, Madam.

If you still say no - then, as soon as I have the license again, I might just turn into a grim fighter against the annual license renewal practice as long as there is breath in my body.

It is entirely up to you, and I am saying this with all due respect, with no hard feelings whatsoever, just as a simple matter of fact, it is either one or the other, grim fighter or cheerful herald of Brighton knowledge! Let´s hope for the latter, I´d enjoy that much more. I would and I am sure we all would.

Yours sincerely, Jochen Lembke"

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

I am sinking low (no, the plane with me actually is, just crossing the South coast) and hopefully I can sort my problems with HCO...

The situation now is that I was being told by the officer of the complaints section of B&H City Council to bring this matter to the Local Government Ombudsman, which I did.

We´ll see! I´ll keep you posted.

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

So, the current situation is I've showed up at the office and their side is they're not helping in any way, would rather see I would stay the f... away and I told them that it's "nothing personal, only business".

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Jochen Lembke, Europe´s cab-driving writer and author of the best Hitch-hiker´s-Guide-to-the-Galaxy-volume-six ever written. Or else money back (haha.)

Perhaps you could recommend that they do an nvq in customer service,they always say the customer is always right even when he's wrong.