Taxi Driver Online

in Morrisons earlier,

her - "we need some gravy granules "
me - "why ? we have a tub full in the cupboard"
her - "yes, they are for chicken though"
me - "so ??"
her - " ah yes, we just bought a chicken" fooking idiot ( it was for me like , shes a veggie AKA pain in the arse )

any of you're lasses thick as a whale omelette then ?

We were at a gig in the drill hall in Lincoln last year, Ian Hunter as your asking,

The wife asked, "whose this band on after Ian Hunter?"

"There isn't one"

"Yes there is, ten o'clock curfew"

I don't often spit out beer, but I did then.

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Former taxi driver

Was watching a Roy Orbison concert on Sky Arts, the wife says he must have recorded this before he died

A world title fight and someone says.........Whose playing ...Hmm not quite playing honey

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if you cannot be yourself, then who can you be.

I handed my (then) wife my camera at a motor sport event so i could nip to the toilet

my mate watched as she took a picture and asked "is there film in that?"


she replied "oh yes"............and opened the camera to show him


not digital....it was a 35mm camera back in the good old days

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Of all the things ive lost, i miss my mind the most

Going past a public weighbridge the wife asks if we have been here before weighbridge '.on a plane going to Amsterdam with her girl friends she looks thru a leaflet ' oooh it says there is an electric market girls !(eclectic Angela!).I could mention a thousand more angelaisms!.

At a car auction with the 1st wife (as before) and some ex-Police cars came through (bite marks and blood on the rear seats of course) the auctioneer said "these have no MOT as Police cars do not require an MOT"


Wife turns to me and says "thats good, you wanna buy one"

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Of all the things ive lost, i miss my mind the most

A suitable wife for you then ie equally cretinous

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All posts by this contributor are made in a strictly personal capacity

I AM PROUD TO BE A CITIZEN NOBODY'S SUBJECT http://www.republic.org.u

F88K EM ALL WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND

BOOZE BOOZE BOOZE

WIVES SHOULD BE "BAREFOOT PREGNANT IN THE KITCHEN AND GAGGED " SOMEONE ONCE SAID .....................

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All posts by this contributor are made in a strictly personal capacity

I AM PROUD TO BE A CITIZEN NOBODY'S SUBJECT http://www.republic.org.u

F88K EM ALL WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND

BOOZE BOOZE BOOZE

some good ones on here lads , thought it was just mine just need one off trotskys twin what his boyfriend said